I’m so excited, humbled, and honored to have had the responses regarding the writing journey I embarking on. The love that has been poured out around the idea of talking about what our family has been through has been tremendous. I have had friends and family reach out to me with support as well as stories about how important it is to speak truth.
I was talking to my mom, pictured above laying on my sisters and I when we were young, about domestic violence and how we do not speak enough about psychological abuse. My mom endured one of the worst cases of psychological abuse I have ever encountered. Because of the abuse she endured she constantly has had the belief that people will judge her as “stupid, gullible, or naïve.” I explained to her that people will not think this way. That is what the trauma and psychological abuse wants you to believe. The abuser wants you to feel like you are crazy, and wants you to be under their spell. She said one of the worst things that happened to her was the isolation. She couldn’t talk to anyone about what she was going through, because she was afraid for her life, her family’s life, her children’s life. For years she was under psychological duress. When it was over, even to this day, she questions her family members thinking they think she is “stupid” in different circumstances. Though we absolutely do not think this, that is what abuse does to you. It plays games on your psyche and makes you second guess yourself and question your judgment and what you think you “should” know. It’s awful.
This is one of the topics that I will address in a significant way in my book. Psychological abuse is so prevalent in todays world yet we don’t give it the credence that it deserves. We talk about physical and sexual abuse, which I will discuss as well, but we tend to gloss over psychological abuse more often than not. This will not be the case with me. Psychological abuse can destroy lives. But the women in my story did not allow that to happen. They took what was done to them, they defied the odds, and they lived to tell the tale. They are prayer warriors, they were women of virtue, and they came out of some of the most difficult circumstances with beautiful stories of resilience.